Monday, February 7, 2011

Awesomeness, Part II: Reasons my job is awesome

Reasons my job is awesome:

(1) I can show up and leave whenever I want so long as I slave away and make my billable hour quota. However, I still have to show up, even if I don't want to (rest assured - I don't want to). So, I guess coming and going is a small concilation prize.

(2) I can work from home if I want. I also have to work from home when I don't want to. Wait a minute, I'm starting to recognize a theme here...

(3) I have a secretary that I can assign the crap work I don't want to do. Now, if I want the work to actually get DONE, assigning her the work really isn't an option.

(4) I manage my own schedule and I'm not micro-managed. Of course, I have to micro-manage my attorneys, who don't have enough time to manage their own emergencies which, in turn, leads to their emergencies taking over my schedule, and the tasks I scheduled for myself get pushed to after-hours work at home. That circulates back to #2 above. (That is possibly the longest circular run-on sentence EVER -- and I am NOT fixing it.)

(5) I have a direct line that I can give out so people can reach me directly without having to deal with our receptionist, who refuses to screen calls, or transfer them to the correct person. Unfortunately, the attorneys give my number out to everyone "in case" the client/ attorney/ judge can't reach them on their direct line. Um, I don't  think "in case" is supposed to be used as a constant. Clients/ attorneys/ judges can NEVER reach the attorneys on their main line, so they call me because I always answer my phone. Then, I put them on hold, go tell attorney they are calling and need to take the call. They ask why the caller is calling, which I tell them, and I tell them the answer to the caller's concern/ question (I can't tell the caller directly because I'm not a licensed attorney). So, I guess I am their glorified receptionist/secretary.  Note: this game doesn't count toward my billable hour quota, so I will have to work more hours at home to "make-up" the time to meet my quota (see #1 and #2 above).

(6) Unlimited paid sick leave (including time off to take care of sick kids). Yes, UNLIMITED. Now, this is a new-age way of telling your employees you trust them and that you don't want them to push their health just for the job. In theory, it is an AWESOME idea. No one abuses the policy because they appreciate it. Here is the problem: the work does not stop while you're out, and you still have to keep up your billable hour quota. They require I make them $15,000 per month average per year, and don't accept sickness as an excuse. So, sick time is more worrisome than it is rest. Hence, I think I get well faster if I'm working like the good little slave I am.

(7) Free lunches for staff meetings. Of course, this means no lunch BREAK.

I am thankful for the many things that make my job awesome.

1 comment:

  1. ditto to all of these - except on # 6 remove "paid" and insert "unpaid" and remove $15,000 and insert $19,250. Although, I do get a bonus of $250 if I make them $22,750 for the month, so that is a perk I suppose.