1. He gets to single-handedly create the freak show of crazies outside his office, then sit back and enjoy.
2. He enjoys that everyone comes to him with their problems with all the other crazies because he delegates all responsibility without delegating the corresponding power to improve office personnel issues.
3. He gets a fat paycheck and doesn't have to share the profits of my success.
4. He gets to take weekends off after he delegates everything to his overworked, underpaid staff (see #3 above).
5. He has a housewife to take care of all his home responsibilities while the rest of us are fortunate enough to have a few hours after slaving away at work to handle our home responsibilities.
6. He can complain about getting up at 4:30 to fly to a deposition, even though I've told him I don't need to hear that because I get up at that time EVERY DAY.
7. One of his biggest choices in his day is between the Porsche and the Escalade in the morning.
8. He gets to ignore Mean Partner.
9. He can ignore the work that has been drafted for a month and sitting in his inbox, and then question me about why it hasn't gone out yet. Of course, it couldn't have been sitting there that long because he's sure he's gone through his inbox since then, even though I have given him weekly reminders that they were still in his inbox and needed to go out.
10. He can routinely schedule a vacation the days before a trial, but refuses to allow staff to schedule vacations close to trials. He has a back-to-back trial schedule, so that little rule equates to staff not being able to take vacations. "Here is vacation time for you. Feel free to use it when you quit."
After writing this, I realized that it may not be as awesome as one thinks to be B-Dub the Boss Man, and that he really deserves all my sympathy.
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