1. Associate successfully argued a motion to dismiss without a specific ruling, and without asking, if the case was dismissed with prejudice. Genius. When I asked her whether it was with prejudice, she just stared at me like I was talking Greek! I tried to explain how important that ruling is on a motion to dismiss, but I was met with nothing but blank stares. I gave up. I guess we'll wait and see what happens.
2. Secretary X saw an email from B-Dub asking her to prepare copies of records to take to a meeting. Before I even read the email, she walked over to me and asked if I saw the email. I read it. She said if I would tag the documents B-Dub needs, she would have New Secretary (who doesn't work for me or B-Dub) make the copies. I wasn't in the mood (that's what she said), so I told her that was fine. So, now she has not only ME doing her work for her, but she sucked in a recruit to do it for her too. Man, life must be grand.
So, after I designated the documents to be copied, I gave it to New Secretary and she butchered it. In New Secretary's mind, double-sided documents need to be copied on single side, and not all the documents I marked need to be copied. When I told her that one of the documents was two-sided, she took the document, turned it upside down on the copier, and single-side copied it again. She then brought me the second half-copied document. So, I was supposed to collate the pages of this 200-page document by hand. Um, I don't think so. Not only that, but if she had copied the document double-sided, it would have taken the same amount of paper as single-side copying every other page. (*Scream*)
So, I handed it back to her and told her I didn't have time to collate it by hand and she needed to copy the document double-sided and bring it back.
3. Secretary X was supposed to send a discovery request and appearance preservation notice (to avoid a default) early last week. She didn't do it. (Stop acting shocked; I don't believe you anymore.) So, when we had a conference call on that case today, I asked her for the file (which didn't have any of the pleadings filed), and she told me it was either in the filing bin, or in the file, and if it wasn't in one of those two places, she didn't know where it was.
So, I looked on the server. There was no pleading folder at all. I went and asked Secretary X whether she actually sent one out. She then confessed she hadn't done it yet because she had three to do, and she hadn't had time to do it yet.
So, instead of being upfront with her laziness, she lied about it and made me run all over the office looking for something she knew didn't exist. LIAR!!!